I wouldn’t know where to start with God even if I did want to become a Christian. You said that the most important first step is recognising that I am a sinner who needs forgiveness, but I don’t think I’ll be able to match up to what he expects from me. Can’t I just go and confess my sins to a priest behind a wooden shutter? On top of that, I’m still wary about the whole ‘going to church’ thing. As for the bible, I don’t even like reading normal books. How do I get my head round that one?
I’m glad you have understood that no matter how much you may feel you have failed in areas of your life, God loves you and wants you to receive his forgiveness. Yes, you mean well, but like every human that ever walked this earth, you were born a sinner and that means you are not good enough to come into God’s presence on your own. You need Jesus, not a priest. He is your High Priest.
But you don’t need any other religious figure to do it for you. Not the pope, not some Imam, not the Archbishop or any other product of creation. You need Jesus Christ who died for your sins and paid the penalty that was yours, and you can come to him without having to go through anyone else.
No disrespect to all the ‘men of the cloth’ out there, but they are just as ungodly as you are. They cannot forgive you of any sin or grant you pardon. And whatever punishment/penance they hand out to people to perform, is ineffective. This is a man-made rule and there are many of them around. The bible says to come directly to God through Jesus Christ and accept that his blood was shed for your sins. No continual recital of a prayer from a book can make you clean.
Phew! That’s a relief! I was never keen on the idea of going into a booth and opening up my life to some stranger sitting behind. Even worse was the thought of what he might make me do in order to get clean again. But you are saying I don’t have to do that. That’s fantastic. So, Jesus took my guilt on the cross and paid the price for my sins? Have I got that right?
Imagine you are 99/0 down and in line for the biggest world cup humiliation in history. Not only would you not play for your country again, you would never play football again. Not even in your own back yard. Such was the embarrassment of defeat, there was nothing to do but accept there was no way out.
You had kicked the ball into your own goal 27 times. You had got angry with the defender and slapped him across the head, causing his team a penalty shoot-out. Such was the rules of your country, if the winning score reached 100 or more, the footballer most at fault would face the electric chair.
The opposing team picked the guy with the longest legs, swiftest foot and the most goals under his belt. He had scored 85 of them already.
Suddenly the captain of the football association ran onto the pitch and took the penalty away. He absorbed the blame and declared you free to fly. You were still guilty, but he was the boss and he demanded that nobody point their finger at you after the field was cleared.
That’s probably not the best analogy, but I promise it shall be my last. Yes, you have understood correctly. Jesus paid what you could not afford. He took your guilt and shame and replaced it with forgiveness and acceptance.
So, what do I do now? I feel like I know nothing. Wouldn’t church people laugh at me if they knew I was a novice at all this?
One of my favourite films is, ‘The Sum of All Fears’ with Morgan Freeman and Ben Affleck. A Russian bomb lands in America and explodes, rendering the US president gasping for revenge. The Russian president knows nothing about it and the attack was not initiated from his nation, but because it was clearly labelled as a Soviet bomb, he is too embarrassed to admit that he did not know where it came from. Thus, owing to his manly pride, he responds by lying – telling the USA that he did indeed attack America – and so a massive nuclear war is about to take place between the two countries.
Don’t let your fears result in you ending up in Hell because you were too scared and too proud to admit that you don’t know anything about Jesus and the bible.
There is nothing shameful about admitting that you need help to understand why you were put on this earth.
Coming back to your questions, I think that maybe you should begin by getting yourself right with God and then talking to him about your concerns. He will guide you to the right church family and will help you with the bible. We are living in an age where thankfully, there are a great many versions and styles to suit all needs. And church is a support network that will help you along the way.
There is no such thing as a perfect church, so try not to be fussy. Ask God to lead you to one that suits you, go there and stay put. You may be able to start attending the same one as a friend or loved-one and if so, they will happily introduce you to others so that you won’t be in a room around strangers.
I know that in general, females find it easier than men to wander into church and start singing songs, but if you open your heart to do the right thing, God will strengthen you and you won’t care about feeling daft. Not when you realise how much you have to gain by getting to know the one who made you and died for you.
You will grow into the man God created you to be, and as you do, you will want to worship him out of the overflow of gratitude from your heart.
Let’s not get side-tracked with that though. Would you like to accept Jesus as your personal Saviour so you can begin a life with him and be saved from the eternal punishment that comes with dying without your sins being forgiven?
Jesus says in his invite to you:
“Look! I stand at the door and knock. If you hear my voice and open the door, I will come in and we will share a meal together as friends.” (Revelation3:20)
Do you want to go through that door?
Yes please!
Okay, say this from your heart and add your own sentences as you feel the need. Do it right now silently if you are amongst others, or if you can quickly get on your own, say it aloud so you can hear yourself speak the words.
“Dear God,
I thank you that you love me even though you are so powerful and mighty. I believe that you are the creator of the massive universe and everything in it. I come to you as a sinner with nothing in my hand. I come to you unworthy of your love, but thankful that you sent your son Jesus to die for my sins. I acknowledge that without you I am lost and I need my sins to be forgiven. I am sorry for all the things I have done that displease you. I am sorry for the sin of keeping you out of my life. I am also sorry for the things I did not do that I should have done. Please forgive me of my sins and help me to live a godly life.
I chose to turn away from those sins and chose to walk in the direction you are leading me. Jesus, I want to know you, not as a religious figure, but as a real personal Saviour and friend. I accept you Jesus, as my Saviour and I have decided to let you into my life so I can learn to be more like you.
I have so many questions and so many thoughts, but I am trusting that you will help me learn at a pace that suits my personality and understanding. Please bring genuine Christian men into my life to help me and show me that being a Christian is the greatest thing any man could do.
Protect my mind from doubts and temptations to walk away from you. Plant me deep into the way of life you created me to have. I now believe you have saved me from my sin and I thank you for everything you are going to do to help me on this journey. Amen.”
If you said that prayer and meant it, the angels in Heaven are having a celebration right now. The bible says that all the angelic beings in Heaven rejoice when a sinner repents and becomes a child of God.
Don’t let anyone talk you out of what you just did. Don’t rely on feelings because feelings are deceptive. Believe in your heart that God has heard you and accepted you and that he will help you in your journey to becoming the person he knows you can be.
Please read Mark chapter 4, verses 1-20, from the bible because it explains about the importance of maintaining a life with Jesus so that you do not end up ‘plucked out of the soil.’ If you don’t have a bible, look up the verse on the internet and opt for a version such as, The English Standard Version (ESV), The New Living Translation (NLT), or The Amplified Version (AMP). Please note that it is widely acknowledged by biblical scholars that the most accurate bible translation is the Authorised Version – also commonly known as the King James Bible. This is written in old English however, so you have to contend with words like, ‘Thee’, ‘Thou’, ‘Ye’, ‘Art’ and ‘Thine’ and also, words ending in ‘eth’. There is a more modern translation that omits these things, which is called The New King James (NKJV). If you really struggle with understanding the bible and want to begin with a paraphrase instead, you can try out The Message. However, keep in mind that this is not a translation, but a paraphrase, and you will need to obtain a proper bible at some stage.
Just one more thing:
Here is the dictionary definition of ‘Macho’:
“Masculine in an overly assertive or aggressive way. A man who is aggressively proud of his masculinity.”
It takes a valiant man to do the right thing. You don’t need to be overly aggressive to be masculine – just be godly.
I applaud you for taking that brave step, no matter how strange it may feel right now. You have just done the most heroic thing you could ever do.
Indeed, if you prayed that prayer whole-heartedly, you are now a REAL man.
