How does a gentleman like you think? What do you believe makes a man, manly? You can tick as many as you like below:
- Owning a big dog.
- Participating in rough, sports like boxing, rugby, American football, martial arts.
- Using bad language.
- Having a pet snake.
- Being a high-flying executive.
- Winning an argument by using insults.
- Having your own office with many staff under you.
- Being a home provider – bringing in a wage that affords your family the finer things in life.
- Passing a rigorous S.A.S. training programme.
- Killing the enemy in a war – defending your country.
- Raising children who become adults with impressive qualifications and careers.
- Walking your daughters down the aisle.
- Knowing you paid for the wedding without needing a bank loan.
- Being told that you’re a great lover.
- Becoming a weight-lifting champion.
- Having sired many children.
- Wearing business suits and designer clothes.
- Having the power to send someone to prison.
- Having the power to sentence someone to death.
- Having the power to fire someone from their job.
- Winning a sports game at international level.
- Being physically strong.
- Securing a recording deal.
- Becoming a model.
- Being good at D.I.Y.
- Having a cool swagger / fancy way of walking.
- Having an arm full of tattoos.
- Smoking weed.
- Being able to tolerate more alcohol than your friends.
- Having large muscles.
- Being a gang leader.
- Wearing thick, gold jewellery and a designer watch.
- Being a warlock.
- Being an ex-inmate / having a criminal record.
- Having a sexy girlfriend.
- Having slept with a large number of women.
- Having a beautiful wife.
- Being a computer whizz.
- Owning a mansion.
- Being able to endure horror films without emotional repercussions.
- Having a flashy car.
- Being able to fly an aeroplane.
Did some of those make you feel guilty? Did your own sense of morality tell you that a few on the list were undesirable?
Whatever you ticked and however they made you feel, know this one thing:
The Lord doesn’t see things the way you see them. People judge by outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.
(1 Samuel 16:7)
Hey, hey, what does that actually mean? What’s wrong with wanting to look good? You are trying to turn me into a softie, aren’t you?
Many of the things listed above are okay. Wonderful, in fact. Who doesn’t want to be successful in business? How lovely it is to walk your daughter down the aisle! It’s great to keep fit and remain in good shape. Ticking dreams off your bucket-list and owning nice things is not a sin.
However, when we admire others only for what we see on the outside:
– how popular they are
– how confident they appear
– how well they seem to be doing financially
– how healthy they look,
we are missing the point.
When we then earnestly desire to be like that ourselves but disregard the importance of working on what’s going on inside our heart – our conscience -our compassion for others – our spiritual state – then we are wasting time on cultivating things in the wrong order.
When we make God’s desires our first priority, then all the other good things will compliment us without controlling us.
So, you mean I have to become religious and do things to please God, like praying seven times a day and packing my job in to work for a charity?
No. Not at all. It is understandable that you think that the terms, ‘pleasing God’ and ‘putting God first’, means you are to give up doing what you enjoy and begin to act like an itinerant missionary.
God wants his creation to be happy and at peace. But true fulfilment only comes when we allow him to guide our lives and recognise that first and foremost, we were born sinners and need to put that right. If we constantly think that life is all about what we can show on the outside, it makes it all superficial and ultimately depressing. Depressing because nothing can ever completely fulfil our desire for joy. Depressing because we will always be striving to become something that we can’t be, even if we are millionaires.
Sin leads to destruction, so even the good things on the list will not complete you until you are living your life in surrender to him.
Giving your life to God is not oppressive, but liberating because he sets you free to become the person he created you to be. If you are already good at business, you can become more so, but in a way that glorifies God and brings you more happiness. The same applies if you are creative, scientific, have leadership skills, I.T. skills, teaching skills or great at making things with your hands. Whether you are a pilot or sportsman, an electrician or an entrepreneur, making room for Jesus in your life makes what you have been gifted to do more purposeful.
What if I work in a pub? Or a night club or betting shop? What if the thing I do for a living is deemed unethical by Christian standards?
Becoming a Christian is not about suddenly giving things up. There may be lifestyle changes to make, but if you open your heart to God, he will convict your conscience about the things that need to be altered in your life. It is about being in relationship with the one who knows you more than you know yourself. He knows why you do what you do and your every circumstance. If there are things you need to change, he will speak to your heart about them and help you to find an alternative lifestyle or group of companions.
You may have habits that you may feel is not in keeping with becoming a ‘child of God’. Your Maker will guide you without poking his finger in your face and screaming at you to stop doing this or that. I cannot guarantee that Christians will be as understanding, patient and gracious though. That’s life. Not every person you come across who claims to be a follower of Jesus will be gentle with you, because everybody is at different stages of their life with their creator and have a lot of tweaking still to do with their own attitudes and responses. Different people take different lengths of time to become like Jesus and it takes a lifetime of learning, repenting, and correcting our ways. Try not to let any human get to you. God’s voice is the one you need to hear the loudest. At the same time, it is important to ensure you have a teachable spirit because God equips spiritual leaders to guide you into the truth.
I must admit, that has put me off in the past. Seeing people come out of church with their nose in the air and appearing to be very unapproachable. I guess I’m scared about that. I don’t want to be judged. I kinda thought that they were like that because God was.
God is saddened when we don’t portray him in a good light. The correct light. Like I said, we are all still a work in progress, but hopefully most of us are moving forward. It really depends on how much we allow Jesus to continually be in our lives and how much we are prepared to spend time studying his Word and making effort to be more like him.
Having a relationship with God is not about following boring rules or forcing yourself to do difficult things like getting up at 3am to pray for 2 hours; or even going without food for weeks on end because you think it will score points with him.
God sent Jesus into the world to release people from the burdens of religion. The religious leaders who thought they followed God actually were a stumbling block to ordinary people and they were jealous of the fact that Jesus was showing people the truth. The truth is that God doesn’t want us to follow religious laws that we cannot keep. Worshipping him comes from a heart that wants to do it because it knows how wonderful God is. Christians obey God’s commands because they bring blessing, not exhaustion, and anxiety.
We’ve kind of gone all over the place with our thoughts and questions and a little off-topic, but I think you’ve come far enough to be able to understand this verse:
Seek the kingdom of God above all else and live righteously and he will give you everything you need.
(Matthew 6:33)
Don’t worry, we all have to keep reminding ourselves of that one!
