(Part 1 of 2)
Wouldn’t it be refreshing if social media posts were more real? Can you imagine what it would be like if people’s sentences on Facebook, Twitter and the like, were less superficial and more honest – like the statements in brackets?
“This is my 76th picture of my cute puppy. Don’t I have the most fluffy, adorable pet?” (“It threw up all over the kitchen floor this morning and has really bad breath.”)
“Here’s a picture of me and my bestie.” (“I’m angry that she still hasn’t given me back those stilettos I lent her 5 months ago – cow.”)
“Night-night everyone.” (“Yes, I’m that lonely that I have to log on here to let you know I’m going to sleep.”)
“Hey, I just got promotion! I’m Managing Director now and have 16 staff under me!” (“I stepped over most of them to get the job. I sucked-up to the boss and spread lies about them to make myself look good.”)
“Look, I’m at the airport!” (“There are thousands of people here doing the same thing, so I can’t show off to them.”)
“Hey, we’re about to get onto the plane.” (“I hope you’re reading this even though it’s 2am, because it makes me feel good knowing that tomorrow, you’re gonna catch a cold while I catch a tan.”)
“Wow, I ran half a marathon in 20 minutes! Can’t wait to do the 20K because I am so fit! I’ve lost 4lbs! (“I’ve lost 4 knee ligaments.”)
“Here’s a magnificent view from our balcony.” (“There’s nothing to do: hubby’s being boring, kids are playing up and I’m really missing Eastenders.”)
“Look at my beautiful cupcakes. Aren’t I talented?” (“I’ve even managed to cover up the burn marks with a great dollop of icing.”)
“Yay! look at all my qualifications. Aren’t I smart?” (“My personality’s awful though. I’ve got a bad temper, I’m very disloyal to my friends, neglective to my children and disrespectful to my elderly parents.”)
“Check out my new website!” (“I’ve not sold anything, but it looks impressive, dunnit?”)
“Oh, my sweet babe is off to university! Cambridge of course.” (“He chose there because drugs are easier to get hold of in the south.”)
“Oh, mine is off to Harvard to study law!” (“It was the uni’ farthest away from home, because she can’t wait to escape from me.”)
“Yes, I’m lounging by the pool relaxing in the hot sun and when I get too warm, I’m going to put down my ice-cold cocktail and dip into that clear, blue cool water.” (“I don’t feel calm at all. It’s too noisy and crowded – I’m constantly wondering if we’ve been burgled and how are we going pay for this holiday when we get back? I’ll have to work extra shifts – ugh!”)
“And this is what I’m having for tea. Yes, I have the most amazing oven and great culinary skills.” (“Husband didn’t like it and toddler spat it out all over the wall.”)
“My little girl is growing up to be such a sophisticated young lady! “She’s only 14 yet she’s got an award for this and a trophy for that and a certificate for the other…” (“And she’s sleeping with the lad next door.”)
“Hey look, I’m friends with all these celebrities! Looks like I chose the best career path.” (“My life sucks and so does theirs, but someone somewhere must be jealous of me surely?”)
“My intelligent son passed his chemistry exam!” I knew that paying shed-loads for tutors would pay off one day. (“He still sucks his thumb, wets his bed and leaves his bedroom like a pigsty.”)
“Look at this super steak I’m eating!” (“Most of it is stuck in my teeth and the mushrooms are giving me wind.”)
“Ha ha, my little boy is so funny! He said this and said that and said this and said that…” (“…and I’ve just clouted him because he’s being vulgar.”)
Ah, friends, it takes too much effort to try to pretend to have the perfect life. I’m not saying social media should become a platform of misery and woe, but come on, let’s get real – most people have battled with: spots, baby weight, mouth ulcers, hairy legs, thinning hair, an obstinate child, bobbly jumpers, boredom, loneliness, lethargy, business failure, flatulence, a horrible restaurant, poor sales on their website, unrisen cakes, unfulfilled dreams, torn dressing gowns, dry skin, leaking boots, dribbling cats, wet socks, miserable children, mediocre school reports, an ugly baby and disloyal friends.
“…but let the one who boasts boast in this, that he understands and knows Me, acknowledges Me and honours Me as God and recognizes without any doubt, that I am the Lord who practices lovingkindness, justice and righteousness on the earth, for in these things I delight,” says the Lord. (Jeremiah 9:24 AMP)
If you regularly visit social media and end up wondering why you feel worse afterwards, know that you don’t really know what’s going on in people’s lives. Don’t take things to heart too much, as humans have a weakness for:
- Attention seeking
- Subtle bragging
- Putting up walls
- Wearing masks
The next time you’re bored or feeling nosey and tempted to log in to see what’s going on, remind yourself you are not missing out on cool conversations – just trivia most of the time. Instead, try getting a piece of paper and listing 60 things you are grateful for and 70 things you are blessed with that many people round the world are not. You’d be shocked at how quickly you fill up your sheet.
I confess that there have been times when I have been looking for the next interesting thing to do at home and instead of getting up to gather the items I need, I lazily pick up my phone and log onto either Facebook or YouTube. YouTube shorts fulfils mankind’s desire for a quick, visual fix without having to listen to something for a long time, or be interrupted by advertisements. It highlights the many different things we are interested in and feeds that constant craving for entertainment.
Facebook goes one step further because we personally know most of the people behind the posts and are therefore, often tempted to make a comment or engage in a discussion, if even it is just agreeing with a group of people that something is amusing, sad, or shocking.
While there is not necessarily anything wrong with these types of activities, if we do not take regular time-out to evaluate why we are adopting these social habits, then we will never realise:
- The futility of time wasting.
- Our deep desire for human connection, which can be a driving force behind the obsession.
- If we are acting out of a feeling of loneliness.
- If we are attention-seeking and if so, is the underlining problem insecurity or pride?
- If we are being spiritually complacent by giving more quality time to worthless activities rather than the Lord.
- If we are participating in these activities moderately and at an appropriate time.
Why is it easier to go onto social media as opposed to reading our bibles? Ah folks, we need to ask ourselves more questions:
Is the bible likely to highlight a sin or attitude that we are not yet prepared to face?
Are we confused about the end-time prophesies and therefore find them scary and depressing?
Have we been saved a long time, but feel guilty because we still don’t understand even the basic stories / lessons?
Does it make us feel like failures because of the many verses that talk about healing, provision and deliverance? (We are still sick, have financial difficulties and feel trapped in certain areas of our lives.)
Do we have relationship struggles that we have given up fighting for because it takes hard work to resolve issues?
One last round of self-searching will help us discipline our use of social media:
Do the lives of everybody else seem more put-together compared to ours? Do people seem to have more friends, better holidays, more exciting birthday celebrations and pose in a more photogenic way than us?
Friends, people’s lives will always appear to be more exciting than ours and it is futile to join in the gang by trying to pretend we are doing amazing, wonderful things all the time. If you spend your Friday nights at home, doing crossword puzzles and you enjoy it, then continue. If you love watching gardening programmes while snuggled up with your kitten, good for you. You are not boring, you are you and embracing the personality God blessed you with. You don’t need to share a photograph of said cat sat by your feet with your pretty curtains in the background just for effect. If you feel cosy and content, it matters not what others may think of your evening. Neither do you need to quickly go online to check what others are doing. Instead, find a Psalm that reminds you of how God loves to sing songs of love over you.
In a nutshell, the falseness will never change, and the availability of things to gawp at online won’t change. There will be more and more fantastic videos uploaded for you to watch during every second of the rest of your life. But some things, we can change. We can make a point of regularly evaluating what we are doing and why, and then we can change what we do with our spare time.
(For Part 2, click here)
